am[y-a-hn-Nmcw: sF. ]n. kn. {]oam-cn- Iuk-enwKv
Author: Anil Kodithottam
Category: Editorial Beat
Publish Date: Sep 5, 2011
Views: 18590
Madhyama Vicharam: IPC premarital counseling.
sskIym{Sntbm ssktm-f-Pntbm A`y-kn hnZ-KvZ-m-cpsS \nb-{-W-n at\m-\ne sXn-b-h, hnjmZ tcmKw `hn-, Bk-n-Iġpw sshIr-X-ġpw ASn-a-s--h XpS-n-b-hsc Huj-[- IqSmsX lrZ-bw-K-amb XXz-t]m-tZ-i--fn-eqsS km[m-cW Pohn-X-n-tev aS-n-sm-p-h-cm kzoI-cn-p Hcp D]m-[n-bm-bn-mWv Iukn-enwKv Adn-b-s-Sp-I. CXp-sImv ^ew Csöv Im ssktm-fn-Pn-p-I sskIym{Sn-p-I-fpsS Acn-Intev Ct-ls ip]mi sNp-p. Huj-[- D]-tbm-Kn-p NnIn sNp-hm\pw acp-p-I Ipdn-m\pw sskIym-{Sn-p-Iġv A\p-a-Xn-bp-v.
hgn sXp aġv A\pw Abpw \Ip KpW-tZmj A`y-k-\-, Ip-kmc A\-cw Itm-enm ]ptcm-ln-X CS-h-Imw-K-ġv \Ip ]m]-tam-N-\hpw D]tZi-fp-samw Iuk-enw-Km-Wv. k`m tbmK--fnse ko-\ -{]-t_m-[-\hpw hfsc hgn-hn-p- t]m-bn-p-s-nepw AXns eyw a\w XI-h-cpsS apdnhp sI-em-Wv. ]gb \nba {]hm-N-I-m, hepXpw `b--chp--amb btlm-h-bpsS Znhkw F \ymb-hn-[n-sb-p-dnv DXv-S-amb Bth-i-tmsS ]d-bp-tmgpw AXns adp-h-iv A\p-k-cn-m e`n-p B{Z-Xbpw Icp-Wbpw {]I-S-am-Wv. Ip-t_m-[-ns s\cp-tm-Sn Aa-cp Zmho-Zns\ kzm-\-s-Sp-p--Xn\v \mYm {]hm-N-Is ZuXyw D]-I-cn-p. sXp-Im-cs\ inn-p-tm Xs ]m-m] hnh-i-t\mSv IcpW Imp ssZh-amWv ss__n-fn D-Xv. AXp-sImv Iuk-enwKv F Bibw ss__n A[n-jvTn-X-amWv Fv \nkw-ibw ]d-bmw.
{InkvXob hn`m-K- ]eXpw ]cm-P-b-am-hp-Ibpw Z-Xn-I hgn-]n-cnIbpw sNpXv km[m-c-W-am-hp-I-bm-Wnv. CXns\ {]Xn-tcm-[n-m hnhm-l-n\v apv h[qh-c-mv IpSpw_ Pohn-X-s-p-dnpw AXnse ssZh-]--Xn-sb-p-dnpw Hs t_m[y-s-Spn IpSpw_ _- ]hn-{X-ambn \ne-\npI F-XmWv hnhm-l-]q Iuk-enw-Kv. kmap-Zm-bnI k`-I CXp ]t sNbvXp-h-cp-p. \ s]s-tmkvXp s]s-tmkvXp m]-I Zm-oI Pohn-Xspdnv ]d-bm FSpp thZn hnhml I-ns sXmp-ap-p \nan-j--fm-Wv. A]qw Nne hyn-I \S-p hnhm-l--sfm-gn-m kab \njvT-bnepw ip{iqjm coXnbnepw s]s-tmkvXv hnhml coXn-Isf Rm {]mIrXw Ft hnti-jn-n-p. hne-Ip-d Xam-i-I Aoew Ie hmIv{]-tbm-K-fpw \psS Nne aqp \c t\Xm--m t]mepw {]tbm-Kn-p-Xv tIn-p-v. h[p-h-c-m-cpsS clky ]m]- XtmSv Gp-]-d-bWw Fv iTn-n-cp Hcp ]p\-eq sa{Xms\ s]s-tm-kvXp-Im Hmp-ptm?
sF. ]n. kn. k`-bn hnhm-l-]q Iuk-enwKv {]m_-ey-n Bp-p-sh Xami tIp. Cu Ah-k-c-n F\nv Hm-h-cp-Xv Ah-cpsS ]n.Pn tImgvkv F {]l-k-\-s-p-dn-m-Wv. sF. ]n. knbvv kzw Fp ]d-bm-hp Htcsbmcp thZ-]-T\ ]-Xn. thsd FhnsS ]T\w \Sn-bmepw ]n.-Pn. -tImgvkv \n_--am-Ws{X! ck-I-c-amb Hcp Imcyw Cu tImgvkv Bcw-`n--Xn\v tijw AhnsS ms-Sp-m Fp Aym-]-I an-tcpw Hcp ss__n kvIqfnse {]mY-anI ]T\w aqew \S-m--h-cm-Wv. Cy Cn-yqv Hm^v Nv amt\-Pvsav F IS-emkp kwL-S-\-bpsS Fw. Fkv. Uyq t\Sn-b-h (tam-d sskUv hov Fm-hmWw Cu Fw. Fkv. Uyqhns hni-Zo-I-c-Ww). tImamfn thjw sIp Ccw Bfp-Ismw bYm thZm-ym-]-Icpw Dv FXv hnkva-cn-p-n-. Chn-Sps Bi Cu "hncp--m'scms-bmWv Iukn-enwKv \S-p--sX-n bu-\-m-cpsS Ah Dm-bn-hm-cy-cpsS \f-N-cnXw B--Y-bnse Za-b-n-bpsS Bi--tmse, .... nXn Kpl-\obw hkvXp ]d-bmtam? F \ne-bn Fpw. {]m]vXcpw A`y-kvX-hn-Zycpw ]Iz-a-Xn-I-fp-sams sF. ]n. knbn [mcmfw Ds-nepw cwK-t_m-[-an-m tImam-fn-IġmWv amv Iuk-enwKv \-Xm-Wv. AXp-sN-p--hp an\naw tbmKy-X-I ]men--s-Sp-n-s-n AXp-m-p Zqjy-h-i- hnh-c-Wm-Xo-X-amWv. \nbaw aqew Iukn-enwKv \n_--am-n-bmepw adp-hgn hnp-hv IymWw \Sn ssIa-S-p- hm-n-tm-Ip t\Xm--m ChnsS [mcmfw D-Xp-sImv CXv Fs\ {]mtbm-Kn-I-am-p-sap IqSn Nnn--Ww. ^mj ]tc-Up-I-fnse dmp-I-fn-tev \Sv ASp-p Awi-hkv{X[mcn-I-sf-tmse AWn-sm-cpn hcp bphanYp\-sf Bioh-Zn-p t\Xm--m ChnsS kpe-`-am-Wv. hnp-h-n-bn alm-dm-Wn-sb-tmse BVw-_-c-tmsS h bph-Xnbvv awKey ip{iqj \Im Hcp Xe-ap-Xn t\Xmhv Aam-n-n-.
]mmXy kmwkvIm-c-ns s\dn-tI-Sp-I AmsS ]In-bp PohnX ssienbpw BtKmfhXv-cW kpJ-kz]v\fn apgpIn AanX kv tiJ-cn-m-\p hy{K-Xbn IpSpw_ _--fpsS ]hn-{XX hnkva-cn-p--XmWv Cs nXn hnti-j--fpsS Imc-Ww. NnIn Cu hnj hy-ns ASn-thcv Adp-p-sIm-m-hms. As-n Cu acw ]pd-s-Sp-hn-p hnj ]g-- Ign-m hcpw Xe-apd \n_-n-X-cm-Ipw. PohnX ssien-bpsS ka{K DS-p-hm IqSmsX Iukn-enwKv F hgn-]mSv Ign--Xp-sImv {]tXy-Inv Hcp KpWhpw Dm-Im\n. ]ns CXp \S-p s]s-tmkvXv X{n-amv Ipsd am\-knI Dmkw Inn-tb-mw. ]v ^vfmn \nv t]meokv ]nSn-Iq-Snb WvTccv X{n-sb-tmse Nne hncp--mv hne-km Hcp emhWw tXSn \S-p-I-bm-bn-cp-p. AXv GXm-sms bmYmy-am-hp-I-bm-Wv. AXp-sImv bu-\-m kqn-p-I. \n-fpsS imco-cn-Ihpw am\-kn-Ihpw Fmsam-amb {]iv\-ġv ]cn-lmc {Inb \n-ln-m Bob WvTccm Hcp-n--gn-p. AXv sF. ]n. kn.-bn XpSngn-m h Iuk-enwKv ]S Iyq \n¡p Nv Hm^v tKmUn-tebpw, G. Pnbn-tebpw, imtcm-\n-tebpw, kzX-{-k-`-I-fntebpw bu-\-m Fp sNpw? hcm-\p-Xv hgn-bn Xptam?
hgn sXp aġv A\pw Abpw \Ip KpW-tZmj A`y-k-\-, Ip-kmc A\-cw Itm-enm ]ptcm-ln-X CS-h-Imw-K-ġv \Ip ]m]-tam-N-\hpw D]tZi-fp-samw Iuk-enw-Km-Wv. k`m tbmK--fnse ko-\ -{]-t_m-[-\hpw hfsc hgn-hn-p- t]m-bn-p-s-nepw AXns eyw a\w XI-h-cpsS apdnhp sI-em-Wv. ]gb \nba {]hm-N-I-m, hepXpw `b--chp--amb btlm-h-bpsS Znhkw F \ymb-hn-[n-sb-p-dnv DXv-S-amb Bth-i-tmsS ]d-bp-tmgpw AXns adp-h-iv A\p-k-cn-m e`n-p B{Z-Xbpw Icp-Wbpw {]I-S-am-Wv. Ip-t_m-[-ns s\cp-tm-Sn Aa-cp Zmho-Zns\ kzm-\-s-Sp-p--Xn\v \mYm {]hm-N-Is ZuXyw D]-I-cn-p. sXp-Im-cs\ inn-p-tm Xs ]m-m] hnh-i-t\mSv IcpW Imp ssZh-amWv ss__n-fn D-Xv. AXp-sImv Iuk-enwKv F Bibw ss__n A[n-jvTn-X-amWv Fv \nkw-ibw ]d-bmw.
{InkvXob hn`m-K- ]eXpw ]cm-P-b-am-hp-Ibpw Z-Xn-I hgn-]n-cnIbpw sNpXv km[m-c-W-am-hp-I-bm-Wnv. CXns\ {]Xn-tcm-[n-m hnhm-l-n\v apv h[qh-c-mv IpSpw_ Pohn-X-s-p-dnpw AXnse ssZh-]--Xn-sb-p-dnpw Hs t_m[y-s-Spn IpSpw_ _- ]hn-{X-ambn \ne-\npI F-XmWv hnhm-l-]q Iuk-enw-Kv. kmap-Zm-bnI k`-I CXp ]t sNbvXp-h-cp-p. \ s]s-tmkvXp s]s-tmkvXp m]-I Zm-oI Pohn-Xspdnv ]d-bm FSpp thZn hnhml I-ns sXmp-ap-p \nan-j--fm-Wv. A]qw Nne hyn-I \S-p hnhm-l--sfm-gn-m kab \njvT-bnepw ip{iqjm coXnbnepw s]s-tmkvXv hnhml coXn-Isf Rm {]mIrXw Ft hnti-jn-n-p. hne-Ip-d Xam-i-I Aoew Ie hmIv{]-tbm-K-fpw \psS Nne aqp \c t\Xm--m t]mepw {]tbm-Kn-p-Xv tIn-p-v. h[p-h-c-m-cpsS clky ]m]- XtmSv Gp-]-d-bWw Fv iTn-n-cp Hcp ]p\-eq sa{Xms\ s]s-tm-kvXp-Im Hmp-ptm?
sF. ]n. kn. k`-bn hnhm-l-]q Iuk-enwKv {]m_-ey-n Bp-p-sh Xami tIp. Cu Ah-k-c-n F\nv Hm-h-cp-Xv Ah-cpsS ]n.Pn tImgvkv F {]l-k-\-s-p-dn-m-Wv. sF. ]n. knbvv kzw Fp ]d-bm-hp Htcsbmcp thZ-]-T\ ]-Xn. thsd FhnsS ]T\w \Sn-bmepw ]n.-Pn. -tImgvkv \n_--am-Ws{X! ck-I-c-amb Hcp Imcyw Cu tImgvkv Bcw-`n--Xn\v tijw AhnsS ms-Sp-m Fp Aym-]-I an-tcpw Hcp ss__n kvIqfnse {]mY-anI ]T\w aqew \S-m--h-cm-Wv. Cy Cn-yqv Hm^v Nv amt\-Pvsav F IS-emkp kwL-S-\-bpsS Fw. Fkv. Uyq t\Sn-b-h (tam-d sskUv hov Fm-hmWw Cu Fw. Fkv. Uyqhns hni-Zo-I-c-Ww). tImamfn thjw sIp Ccw Bfp-Ismw bYm thZm-ym-]-Icpw Dv FXv hnkva-cn-p-n-. Chn-Sps Bi Cu "hncp--m'scms-bmWv Iukn-enwKv \S-p--sX-n bu-\-m-cpsS Ah Dm-bn-hm-cy-cpsS \f-N-cnXw B--Y-bnse Za-b-n-bpsS Bi--tmse, .... nXn Kpl-\obw hkvXp ]d-bmtam? F \ne-bn Fpw. {]m]vXcpw A`y-kvX-hn-Zycpw ]Iz-a-Xn-I-fp-sams sF. ]n. knbn [mcmfw Ds-nepw cwK-t_m-[-an-m tImam-fn-IġmWv amv Iuk-enwKv \-Xm-Wv. AXp-sN-p--hp an\naw tbmKy-X-I ]men--s-Sp-n-s-n AXp-m-p Zqjy-h-i- hnh-c-Wm-Xo-X-amWv. \nbaw aqew Iukn-enwKv \n_--am-n-bmepw adp-hgn hnp-hv IymWw \Sn ssIa-S-p- hm-n-tm-Ip t\Xm--m ChnsS [mcmfw D-Xp-sImv CXv Fs\ {]mtbm-Kn-I-am-p-sap IqSn Nnn--Ww. ^mj ]tc-Up-I-fnse dmp-I-fn-tev \Sv ASp-p Awi-hkv{X[mcn-I-sf-tmse AWn-sm-cpn hcp bphanYp\-sf Bioh-Zn-p t\Xm--m ChnsS kpe-`-am-Wv. hnp-h-n-bn alm-dm-Wn-sb-tmse BVw-_-c-tmsS h bph-Xnbvv awKey ip{iqj \Im Hcp Xe-ap-Xn t\Xmhv Aam-n-n-.
]mmXy kmwkvIm-c-ns s\dn-tI-Sp-I AmsS ]In-bp PohnX ssienbpw BtKmfhXv-cW kpJ-kz]v\fn apgpIn AanX kv tiJ-cn-m-\p hy{K-Xbn IpSpw_ _--fpsS ]hn-{XX hnkva-cn-p--XmWv Cs nXn hnti-j--fpsS Imc-Ww. NnIn Cu hnj hy-ns ASn-thcv Adp-p-sIm-m-hms. As-n Cu acw ]pd-s-Sp-hn-p hnj ]g-- Ign-m hcpw Xe-apd \n_-n-X-cm-Ipw. PohnX ssien-bpsS ka{K DS-p-hm IqSmsX Iukn-enwKv F hgn-]mSv Ign--Xp-sImv {]tXy-Inv Hcp KpWhpw Dm-Im\n. ]ns CXp \S-p s]s-tmkvXv X{n-amv Ipsd am\-knI Dmkw Inn-tb-mw. ]v ^vfmn \nv t]meokv ]nSn-Iq-Snb WvTccv X{n-sb-tmse Nne hncp--mv hne-km Hcp emhWw tXSn \S-p-I-bm-bn-cp-p. AXv GXm-sms bmYmy-am-hp-I-bm-Wv. AXp-sImv bu-\-m kqn-p-I. \n-fpsS imco-cn-Ihpw am\-kn-Ihpw Fmsam-amb {]iv\-ġv ]cn-lmc {Inb \n-ln-m Bob WvTccm Hcp-n--gn-p. AXv sF. ]n. kn.-bn XpSngn-m h Iuk-enwKv ]S Iyq \n¡p Nv Hm^v tKmUn-tebpw, G. Pnbn-tebpw, imtcm-\n-tebpw, kzX-{-k-`-I-fntebpw bu-\-m Fp sNpw? hcm-\p-Xv hgn-bn Xptam?
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john (September 8, 2011)
in my openion it is not pre-marital, but post-marital counseling should be given.
our pastors /appachans and elders of all age should be sent to marital counselings first. then let the young people about to be married sent for counseling.
i am for opening a booth in ipc kumbanadu for counseling sessions of our elders.
i am sure somany people wants to do that, pretty couseling shops all across on thiruvall and kozhencheri route.
do not leave other pentecostal head quarters all across kerala. if wanted we can start in america also for those migrated already before this great phenomene...
in my openion it is not pre-marital, but post-marital counseling should be given.
our pastors /appachans and elders of all age should be sent to marital counselings first. then let the young people about to be married sent for counseling.
i am for opening a booth in ipc kumbanadu for counseling sessions of our elders.
i am sure somany people wants to do that, pretty couseling shops all across on thiruvall and kozhencheri route.
do not leave other pentecostal head quarters all across kerala. if wanted we can start in america also for those migrated already before this great phenomene...
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Brother John: I do agree with your opinion that every congregation must have a qualified couselor to help the married couples. If the counselor was
landed from India and if he or she is trying to counsel with the Indian mentality of fatalism, also finding more fault and weakness with the wife,
that counseling will create more frictions at home. Years back, husbands used work to earn the income to feed the family, now to live in prosperity and luxury, both the husband and wife have to work. Our love for more material things of the world will create more tensions in the family life. If we are poor with the material things of the world, the spiritual leaders will look us down as divinely cursed people because the U.S. made prosperity gospel has brainwashed them. The counselors
must be qualified, totally open minded to be effective in this job.